Struggling...

I am struggling right now, with a few things...

My grandparents have accepted that they have gotten to the age where they need to sell their house. This is the one place in my life that has been consistant for me. Its sad for the family in general I think. My daughter and I have been going over there trying to help by getting stuff all cleaned up and clear out a bunch of stuff to prepare for listing and selling.

I have been wondering what direction I want to go in life. The same thing always creeps into the back of my head. I really want to start a clothing line. I have been sketching some designs since I was a teenager and just feel its what I should be doing. There is a hiccup.... I can't sew. I have been trying to find somewhere that I could learn how to, but to no avail.

My house... or lack thereof. I am working to get our place fixed up so that we can sell it. I started with tiling of my ensuite. I am quite pleased with the outcome and look forward to doing the main bath, the laundry room and the entry way. That should provide some added value. Hopefully we can work something out to get us into a better place before the busy summer season starts.

Kids, this is something I struggle with all the time. I love my kids dearly but sheesh. I try and try and try and always feel like I fall short in their eyes. I would love to be a stay at home mom, be able to go to all my daughter's volleyball, soccer, basketball etc games and volunteer in my son's class all the time, but its just not a possibility. Maybe this is part of me feeling lost in my direction in life.



Lets not look too far into this though. I love my kids, I have an amazing husband and am lucky enough to have a lot of family, both blood and extended... I just struggle.